fissionmailed | obligatory fourth of july post

Kiss me.

[She says this like how one says a greeting or speaks in a casual conversation.]

? [That took him by surprise, but irresistibly...like a moth to a flame, he obeys her command. He carefully kneels down and leans in to plant a gentle kiss on her lips.]

[She presses her lips back, there's a bit more force into it, but it still remains gentle.

When she pulls away, her lips are still very close to his.]

Why would you deny yourself of happiness when you deserve it the most?

I don't understand... [John whispers back to her. He's not entirely sure where she's going with this.]

[She rests a hand on his face, pulling back a bit more.]

You always make it sound like you don't deserve to be happy. [Then she leans forward again, resting her cheek against his own.] There's plenty more emotions than those that are on the battlefield, you know.

[He sighs quietly when their faces touch. He doesn't reply to her remarks, she just lets her speak her mind while he enjoys their closeness.]

You have the best intentions for everyone else.

[She tilts her head a little, her eyelashes gently brushing against his cheek.] But not for yourself.

[In a way, she's the same. Not to a point where she doesn't think she deserves happiness, though.]

...

[He listens to what she has to say, but his deserving of happiness died years ago the day he killed the Boss. He hasn't known true happiness since that day. His heart remains broken and his soul void, but he's become extremely adept at feigning mirth when needed.]

[She pulls back again, her face half-illuminated by the lights.]

You're going to continue feeling that way, aren't you?

You have me, Snake. I'm right here in front of you. [She firmly grabs his wrist and places his hand on her waist.] Everything else here might be fake, but this is real. I'm a real live person here in front of you... and you're going to think that there's no way you can still feel anything?

Edited 2009-07-06 17:44 (UTC)

[He looks over at her, and she remains a real vision of loveliness.]

I prefer to give pleasure than take it.

[He presses that hand of his against her waist a little more. He smiles, but can she tell if it's a real one or a very convincing fake.]

You're not the only one.

[She smiles back at him, her hand gently touching the one that's on her waist.]

But doesn't it please you when someone else is happy and well because of you? As a doctor, I've always felt that way.

[Gently, she shifts, the hem of her dress going from her knees to a few inches above them.]

Yes. It pleases me to see others happy [and it's the only way he feels a little less than completely dead inside these days].

[His gaze darts to that knee of hers...]

Two people who get pleasure out of seeing other people be happy... it's a bit of a paradox, isn't it? [She softly laughs, moving closer again.]

I suppose it is.

[He tries to give her a more cheerful face, since he's sure that's what she wants. The real him isn't...as cheerful as she remembers from the past.]

[She removes her hand from his and places it gently on his chest for support.]

You don't have to fake a smile for me, you know. [Before she lets him respond, she slides a little bit more to the edge of the chair, and kisses him again.]

[If she really meant that, then he won't. Before he could even think of something to possibly say, his lips are locked with hers again.]

[She enjoys feeling something real for once. Everything here is either fake or gradually goes away over time. The rooms change them only for a second, some of them are even made to look real, and certainly feel real.

They may be under a fake sky, but what she's feeling now is more real and alive. She had missed that feeling. A part of reality slipping into the distance and fading away when she found Ivanya's body those few months ago.

Her body shifts again, the hem of her dress going up a bit more, as she presses herself closer to him.]

Edited 2009-07-06 18:56 (UTC)

[For John, it does feel nice to be kissed. Actually kissed. Unfortunately, this union is more for the sanity and sake of Jane than it is for him. If it will help her feel better, more grounded, then he is willing to help in any way possible. She's a nice lady and he hates to see her frown so he will do what he can to keep a smile on her face.]

[As she slides her hand from his chest, to his neck, her fingers gently brush against his skin. Breaking the kiss, she tilts her chin upward, her smooth pale neckline exposed a bit more.]

See? Feeling good emotions isn't so bad, is it?

[It's easier not to answer her question. He stays silent and vague.]

[She watches him for a moment, waiting for an answer. When he doesn't say anything, she presses her lips together, feeling a bit frustrated. She stands up.]

It's late.

Yes, it is. [He glances at the darkened 'sky' then back to Jane.] As unusual as it is, I have grown very used to it's artificiality.

I think everyone gets tired of the sky sometimes. [She moves past him and starts walking toward the door to inside.] Whether it be fake or real.

Perhaps.

[She opens the door then stops to look over her shoulder.]

You'll walk me to my room, right?

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