Wrestling Arena

[whyamisobritish.livejournal.com]

[Liquid steps into a room and is deafened by screams.]

[Pyrotechnics launch to either side. 80s arena rock blares, competing with the shouts of the fans that fill the stadium.]

[The announcer's voice booms through the speakers as Liquid strides down the isle in tights painted with flames. He revels in the shouts like a born showman.]

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! GET READY FOR

Theeeee Anglo Adonis, the Liverpool Lothario, the Tea-Sipping Terror! The pile of might from the Isle of Wight! Manchester's premier manchest!

[He vaults into the ring with a flip, landing perfectly with arms upraised, drinking in the hatred like the light of the sun]

LIQUIIIIIIID SNAAAAAAAAKE!

[Liquid grabs a microphone from a ref and shoves him away.]

[He paces the ring, scowling and sneering]

I see the scum of the world is out in force tonight!

[He is rewarded with a chorus of boo and shouts of outrage.]

How kind of you to crawl out of your gutters to pay tribute to your superior!

[His accent is exaggerated, because British people are terrible and you hate them so much.]

[He gives a dramatic toss to his luxurious mane of hair.]

Surely that must be why you're here.

[Then sweeps out his arms and shouts]

I DON'T SEE ANY MEN HERE TO GIVE ME A FIGHT!

[BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!]

[Liquid waits for it to die down to the perfect hush, in order to wring the maximum drama from the moment.]

Is that all? Is it too much to hope that these pathetic colonies provide one challenger!?

((It is time to throw your hat to the mat and wrestle down. There's room for all varieties of heroes and scumbags; wrestlers, managers, commentators, the buxom ladies in spandex who hang around to no immediate purpose. The only law is terrible, terrible nicknames.))

((I apologize to every British person. Ever.))

Comments

buxom ladies, you say

[imthe-shit.livejournal.com]

[ Snake frowns, feeling a bit ill after listening to Liquid toot his own horn like that. He rubbed his temples, knowing that the man would love it even if the audience was booing at him. ]

I bet Mistress'd make short work of you... [ Grabs for a bottle of water-- and sort of just realizes the bright blue spandex pants he's in... He's shirtless... and there's a large python slithering about his shoulders. Snake does the manliest thing possible. ]

Nrhgh!

[ Throws the snake off, dodge-rolls and hides under a nearby box. It wasn't to say he was afraid of snakes-- rather... he never expected them to be crawling on him so amicably. ]

[whyamisobritish.livejournal.com]

What's that? An old man hiding in the corner?

[DRAMATIC POINT]

Hobble back to the home, grandfather.

[imthe-shit.livejournal.com]

[The box shuffles a bit, and Snake peers out of one of the handle holes, looking at Liquid. Suddenly, their fight on Metal Gear Rex seemed to make a lot more sense.

Standing up, Snake threw off the box, the python slithering up to him.]

Grandfather, huh... [He didn't appreciate being called that.]

[whyamisobritish.livejournal.com]

[As dramatic entries go, it isn't the best, but it'll do.]

So you've finally come out of hiding!

[sneers] Why don't you surrender and save yourself a broken hip.

[imthe-shit.livejournal.com]

[Looks around, the ambiance of shouting from the crowd is a little distracting.]

Hn?

[Looks at Liquid.] Sorry, I didn't catch that.

[whyamisobritish.livejournal.com]

[you want him to yell louder?]

[imthe-shit.livejournal.com]

[Smirks just as Liquid starts to yell. He hoists up the Python, before suddenly chucking it at the blond man, then running at him to fight.]

[whyamisobritish.livejournal.com]

[NO ONE EXPECTS A SNAKE IN THE FACE]

[Liquid struggles with it just long enough to go down under Snake's charge to a roar of cheering from the crowd]

[He throws his weight to flip him over]

[imthe-shit.livejournal.com]

[Grunts, landing on his back and hissing somewhat, but he kicks his legs up, attempting to get some distance between himself and Liquid.]

[whyamisobritish.livejournal.com]

[Liquid springs to his feet] Hissing, old man? If you spend so much time with reptiles, you should be excellent at crawling!

[He runs and bounces from rope to rope until he gets the momentum for a clothesline]

[imthe-shit.livejournal.com]

[Grunts, wincing a bit in pain-- Liquid likes talking, that's his thing. Snake can't stand it during a battle... At least not when it's this guy's voice. He watches what Liquid's up to, eyes widening somewhat, and he prepares for the clothesline, aiming to move into a roll to dodge, then follow-up with a choke-hold.]

[whyamisobritish.livejournal.com]

[Liquid: a talker in all things]

[He swings over Snake's head, throwing himself off balance as the crowd roars]

Ngh!

[He grabs ineffectually at Snake's arm]

[imthe-shit.livejournal.com]

[Tightens his grip on Liquid's neck, squeezing him somewhat, before he pins him on the ground and sits on his back, letting out a light chuckle... But the python is coming back and somehow that startles Snake enough to loosen his hold on Liquid.]

I do, actually

[ladyofvermilion.livejournal.com]

[Right on cue there's a familiar woman standing just outside the ring, dressed in a leather belly shirt that pushes up her breasts and just manages to cover her nipples, a leather skirt that doesn't even come down to mid-thigh, and high heel boots. Her hair is tied back in an elaborate bun.]

[Julie walks over to Snake and slips her fingers underneath his box to lift it off him. Her voice purrs to him just loud enough for him to hear.]

Come on out, handsome. The only thing you need to fear biting you is me.

===/(゜Д゜)/

[imthe-shit.livejournal.com]

[Looks up, an exclamation mark JUST ABOUT TO APPEAR, but it manages to conceal itself when Snake realizes who it is. He slowly stands up, looking at Julie.]

Janet...

\-3-\

[ladyofvermilion.livejournal.com]

Dave...

[Once he comes up to her height, she smiles deviously and pulls him in to claim his bottom lip for a thorough kiss.]

BUTTS IN

[whyamisobritish.livejournal.com]

EXCUSE ME! WE HAPPEN TO BE FIGHTING A FANTASTICALLY FLAMBOYANT LIFE OR DEATH BATTLE AT THE MOMENT!

FFF

[imthe-shit.livejournal.com]

[Just about to enjoy himself, Snake is pulled out of it by Liquid's annoying voice. He frowns, takes a step away from Julie, before he tenses up and shouts.]

Hhrrrr... LIQUIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID!!!

[ladyofvermilion.livejournal.com]

[Once Snake is done deafening her, Julie steps closer to him once more, hanging on him with one arm wrapped around his back and the other stroking his chest as she looks at Liquid, her entire posture screaming that she's very happy with the man she has, thank you very much, and back off.]

[whyamisobritish.livejournal.com]

[You mean Liquid's rich, stentorian voice]

Do you intend to fight while wearing a woman? I think you have plenty of handicaps already.

[imthe-shit.livejournal.com]

[Feels her hug him, and... he suddenly feels very territorial. ... Is this because of the adrenaline?]

I've knocked you down twice, pinned you twice. You're one to talk about handicaps.

[ladyofvermilion.livejournal.com]

[Still looking at Liquid, Julie adresses him as well.]

And I know a real man when I see one, sweetheart.

[She practically spits the last word and plants a kiss to Snake's cheek. If this doesn't make him feel good, then he's a lost cause.]

[whyamisobritish.livejournal.com]

Nothing less than a clean pin counts, old man.

[to the woman] What would I- wait, who the devil are you?

[ladyofvermilion.livejournal.com]

I am Lady Luck, and I believe it's clear who I favor.

[She pats Dave's chest and whispers in his ear.] Go get him, Dave. Make me proud.

[With that, she steps back to allow the men to resume their match.]

[imthe-shit.livejournal.com]

[NO PRESSURE. He nods slowly, before suddenly running forward, throwing a punch at Liquid.]