in which Octopus has apparently mistaken an innocent potted plant for dear_mun

[downtotheblood.livejournal.com]

[A figure in a ragged trenchcoat storms through the building's front door, slams it behind him, belatedly realizes this implies he has actually been outside the building, and spends a few seconds looking nonplussed before returning to his previous grim determination. This largely consists of gesticulating wildly and ranting at thin air, or perhaps at a potted plant sitting forlornly in the center of the lobby.]

Fine! I'll go it alone! Don't need no messed-up kid tellin' me how t'run my life! I'm rebellin', baby! My own man! My own boss! Don't got th' time? Make time! 'Cause I got a few things t'tell you-

[A sixteen ton weight drops from... somewhere and lands about three inches away from the tips of his toes. The breeze nearly blows his hat off. But not snow, nor sleet, nor sixteen ton weights will deter Octopus from his self-righteous raving.] Godmod me, willya? I see how it... uh. [It suddenly occurs to him exactly how inane a remark that was.]

Look, princess, I'm fed up with yer excuses. Call this busy? Yer life won't be "busy" fer another four'r five months yet. An' don't tell me yer not in some theoretical groove, 'cause clearly I am gettin' along just fine. To hell with the rest of 'em - if I'm th' last one draggin' you back here then so be it. My voice will be heard! [Alain adjusts his fedora to what he deems to be a ruggedly determined angle, tries to find the proper direction to glare in, and ends up glaring at the aforementioned plant.] Even if I gotta take matters into my own hands.

[YOU CAN'T STOP THE BEAT, BITCHES well okay just th' one. Maybe two.]

[[THIS IS INCREDIBLY SILLY. Let's see how unhiatusing goes this time!]]

Comments

[cryifiwantto.livejournal.com]

I'M BACK TOO, YOU KNOW.

[downtotheblood.livejournal.com]

Man, quit tryin' to horn in on my upliftin'ly triumphant monologue.

[cryifiwantto.livejournal.com]

SO YOU ADMIT YOU'RE TALKING TO YOURSELF?

[downtotheblood.livejournal.com]

That ain't what monologue means an' you know it.

[worldpresident.livejournal.com]

[...]

[Solidus stares at the apparently insane man before having a Snake Arms slowly reach for his radio. He'd just been doodling on the wall of the lobby when this guy had shown up.]

[If he was going to need to call for help again, Daddy was going to be mad.]

[downtotheblood.livejournal.com]

[Octopus is PERFECTLY SANE. Completely sane. HELLA SANE. He is the ONLY SANE MAN in a world... narrated by Don LaFontaine. THAT IS HOW FLIPPIN' SANE HE IS, OKAY?]

[Would a crazy man adjust his hat in such a dignified manner and clear his throat so dignified-like? HELL NO.] 'Sup, [he nods sanely at th' robot tentacle kid. Man, they didn't have bitchin' toys that cool when Alain was growin' up, no siree.]

[worldpresident.livejournal.com]

[Yep, this dude was nuts.]

[But he didn't seem to be the bad-crazy like Belle or the Bad Solid. Just nexus-crazy, like everyone else.]

Hello...[A Snake Arm waves cautiously.] Were you just outside?

[downtotheblood.livejournal.com]

[Um. Octopus considers this.] I... don't know. [Suspiciously, he casts a worried glance back at the door. Wait, wasn't that a revolving door just a second ago? ...then how th' hell did he slam it?] Somewhere out there, maybe not that outside. [Such dizzying concerns of topography are probably beyond the ken of a child... they sure are beyond Octopus.]

[worldpresident.livejournal.com]

Oh...'Cause I don't wanna go home, but Daddy might make us if there's a way to go back.

[He peers curiously at the man. He's never met anyone who looked like him before, maybe this was a brand-new person? He steps away from his crayon scribble to get a better look.]

What's your name? Who were you talkin' to?

[downtotheblood.livejournal.com]

I don't blame ya, kid. This place is th' best. [Have one more pointed glare, potted plant he is absolutely not glaring at!]

Decoy Octopus, master o' disguise. [Of course his reputation doesn't precede him, that's what being a master of disguise is for.] How 'bout you?

Uh, I was just talkin' to... some... [Octopus gestures vaguely at the ceiling.] chick... eh, forget it. Reckon I made my point.

[worldpresident.livejournal.com]

Yeah it is! I've made lots an' lots of friends here; I even met my Momma and my Mommy!

[He grins and offers his hand to shake.]

I'm Solidus Snake, future President. Is your name really Octopus? Are you in FOXHOUND like Mister Raven? He calls me "Little Octopus" sometimes 'cause of my Snake Arms!

[The Arms in question wave a more confident greeting.]

[downtotheblood.livejournal.com]

Same here. Momma an'-? [Oh no. He is not asking another Snake about their convoluted family history. Maybe that one Mantis was right and Liquid's just really bad at genetics, but Octopus just wants to preserve the precious few brain cells he has left.]

[Grinning, he shakes the squirt's hand.] Nice t' meetcha, Mr. Future President. I'd vote fer a junior octopus any day. [Octopus attempts to shake one of the robotic arms for good measure.] Yep, good ol' FOXHOUND, me an' Mr. Raven an' a buncha other jerks. Can't have a special forces unit without a master o' disguise, right? [Even if you think you don't have one, your special forces unit has a master of disguise.]

[worldpresident.livejournal.com]

[He laughs a little and happily has a Snake Arm shake his hand too. He puts a little flair into it as well, just to show off a tiny bit.]

[He did catch that aside, though.] Momma's my Momma, at least in her world. My world's version is a boy, so I still don't know who my real Mom is, but Momma gives good hugs. Mommy's going to be Liquid an' Solid's mommy, but she said here that she wants to be my mommy too.

[Solidus grins up at Octopus, thrilled to meet a friend of Mr. Raven's.] Us Octopuses gotta stick together, right? [He nods sagely, or tries to, as he tests out a new word.] A master of disguise is essential to a unit!

[carrioncannon.livejournal.com]

When one speaks to plants, oe must be very quiet to hear them answer.

[downtotheblood.livejournal.com]

Quiet nothin', I've had it with all this backtalk-- wait, what plants?

[carrioncannon.livejournal.com]

[downtotheblood.livejournal.com]

[Fuck the plants! :D &hearts]

[This ineffectual flailing is an Octopus hug. Eight arms to hold you, as they say!]

[downtotheblood.livejournal.com]

[w-wait how deadly are we talkin' here]

[carrioncannon.livejournal.com]

[And two to crush you like a cuddly, affectionate iceberg.]

[Perhaps no one says that.]

[Only if you can die from happy reunions.]

It's good to see you, my friend.

[downtotheblood.livejournal.com]

[Whatever floats your boat wait icebergs don't do that never mind]

Yer tellin' me. We gotta stop meetin' like this. Gotta get some damn stability in my life, y'know? [He frees an arm from the hug to flip off the ceiling, or maybe that plant again. It's kinda hard to aim with his face buried in Raven's chest.]

Missed ya like anything. [Do people say that? Octopus says that.]

[carrioncannon.livejournal.com]

[Raven rests a huge hand on Octopus's back.]

I missed you too.

[the-blue-danube.livejournal.com]

[Arthur stopped his stroll down the hallway and watched the man's speech unfold, his cigarette hanging loosely on his lips. He took the product between his fingers and took it out of his mouth's grasp after sucking the smoke in. He breathed out the smoke slowly.]

You do realize you're talking to a plant, right?

[downtotheblood.livejournal.com]

[Octopus spins to face the man, barely avoiding getting tangled in his own coat.]

No sir, I do not.

[What a weird thing t'say.]

[the-blue-danube.livejournal.com]

....

[He stuck his cigarette back into his mouth.]

Do you happen to know if there's any bars here in the Nexus?

[epic-advice.livejournal.com]

[Sigint's... not even sure if he should interrupt, but-]

...Carrot-top?

[downtotheblood.livejournal.com]

Heeeeey, Donnie! [Rakish (and only slightly manic!) grin.] If it ain't the Arthur to my Ford! [I.e., "sane guy who knows a crazy redhead and to which improbable things often happen".] How ya been?

[epic-advice.livejournal.com]

...The who to your who?

[Sigint can't help but smile, despite not catching that reference. He really missed his buddy, though he probably wont be admitting that out loud. First major Zero comes back, now Octopus... This month's been pretty great! ....Except that he can't find Alice anywhere...]

[Shrugging] Eh- You know me. Same as usual. What about you? Seems like you were gone for a pretty long ass time!

[liquidouroboros.livejournal.com]

...Octopus? What the hell?

[downtotheblood.livejournal.com]

I know, right? Only so much jerkin' around a guy can take, y'know? Sometimes ya just gotta step up an' be a man about it! Assert yer authority! [...he may be recruiting.]

[liquidouroboros.livejournal.com]

What on earth are you on about?!

[camebacksad.livejournal.com]

[Zombie Sorrow is attracted by the noise. He's just gonna staaaaaare...]

[downtotheblood.livejournal.com]

Now see? [Gesturing at the Sorrow, Octopus crows triumphantly.] This is what I'm talkin' about! This is th' nexus I know an' love certain things about.

[Having apparently made his point to the houseplant (for now), Octopus saunters up to the zombie to say hello.] So, what happened t'you? Not gonna eat my brains, are ya? 'cause I can prob'ly outrun you.

[camebacksad.livejournal.com]

Brraaainnns?

[That was that almost-rain-sounding word, Zorrow remembers. He tries to make some, and gets a disappointingly brief drizzle.]

Sad.

[gameboy-sniper.livejournal.com]

What did the plant do to you?

[fakefse.livejournal.com]

Back so soon?

[A familiar cackle slips around an ever-present cigarette.]

And here I haven't even gotten a chance to impersonate you yet.